A friend can love you because of your strengths.
A friend can love you because of what you are to them.
A friend can love you because of how you make them laugh.
A friend can love you because of what you teach them.
But a deeper friendship is cultivated when...
They love you because of your strengths... and despite your weaknesses.
They love you because of what you are to them... and despite what you're not.
They love you because of how you make them laugh... and forgive you when you make them cry.
They love you because of what you teach them... but they know how to teach you as well.
This type of friendship brings a transparent honesty to the relationship and acknowledges the other's abilities and gifts. The first type of friendship is exhausting for the subject because they have to be superman all the time, and it's not healthy for the bestower because they are content with being weak and dependent in the relationship. But the second type is one that allows for the cognizance of weakness and strength in both individuals, which prompts humility, consequently causing a sense of vulnerability and openness. This sense of vulnerability seems to be communicated almost subconsciously, as a silent agreement and realization between the two individuals.
I have a friend that I've known for a long time, and at one point I began to prize myself, my strengths, and my maturity level above his/hers. This brought frustration to my friend, and distanced our relationship for a short time until I realized what I had done. As soon as I apologized, hence restoring needed humility to my end of hte relationship, and began to conduct myself in a way that communicated a sense of openness and vulnerability, the friendship healed.
It requires strength, but acknowledgement of weakness. Purpose to be all you can, but realization of your shortcomings. Laughter, but a willingness to cry. Teachability, but also the commitment to provide instruction.
Lord God, help me be that type of friend.
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